Story 4 – Could I Be To Blame?

Story 4 - Could I Be To Blame?

I’ve been following up with a guy on social media for months without him noticing me. It was on a Wednesday, 20th April 2017 when he buzzed me. I was so surprised and eager to reply, so we got to talk and know each other better. We hooked up, not once, not twice. I liked this guy a lot, maybe because I never get the kind of attention he gave me.

We often met at his friend’s house and most times I just can’t hold back my admiration for him. Most times I went home dripping in my pants, I’m not a fan of touching myself so I just sleep it off and wait to see him again. On the 6th of July 2017. He invited me over to his house. I got funny advice from my friend to learn to be seductive with my dressings, so I went with a short gown. I got to his apartment, he offered me a soft drink and meat pie. Then he sat close to me, touched my thigh, I turned and looked at him, he smiled at me and drew close to kiss me. It was deep and sensitive. I wanted more of that and as he pleased my envy, he became more touchy, and gave me a look ‘if it was cool with me’.

I wanted more added to his touch. I left that day fulfilled, I had gotten what I wanted to. It always played back, he was so good. I turned it to an almost everyday thing. I meet him every time I had a chance to. I don’t know who thinks sex keeps a man, but it was what I thought, so I saw someone I like, I went for it. A couple of months went and I’d found out I’ve missed my period, I didn’t want to tell him so I kept it for a little longer.

Three months went, I saw signs of pregnancy, it then dawned on me that I was pregnant. I had to tell him. I met him at the mall, even in this situation I was dripping once again in my panties. I told him after we talked about his business trips and all that. He looked me straight in the eyes and said: “Rose, I’m not ready for a child yet”. I know he’s not ready but what would do you have me do, I am four months gone. I couldn’t yell but I need us to talk. I’m just a student, soon enough my parents will find out. I expected more from him, but he said he’d see me the next day, and that was how we ended the conversation.

Immediately he left, I called my friend, she agreed to meet up so I waited. It wasn’t long when Jessica got to the mall, I was in tears, she was someone I told everything. I wanted to get the burden of having a child. I knew someone who’d do it cheaply, so I had Jessica join me at the clinic. The doctor there told me it was difficult for a four-month-old, he added: “ If you want me to continue it will hurt a lot”.

I signed up for an abortion for the first time in my life, Jessica was there with the comforting words so I was okay to do this. It wasn’t long, we were done. I was hurting a lot more than he explained it would. The pains were not just from the termination, my heart spoke in volumes. My body couldn’t carry a much greater burden. Nonetheless, I had Jessica see me home and tell my mum that I was suffering from menstrual cramps. I know you wonder how she believed. She trusts me a lot to not let her down. But I did the opposite.

He called, the next day, I told him what I had done already, he was very angry. He went on to say he wanted to let his family know first and come back to meet mine, I screwed it all up. I should have just waited, but I didn’t, I moved too fast. I was foolish enough to continue seeing him, after all, that happened, this was a fresh year so I was thinking he’d ask me to be his girlfriend because we got a lot serious. One day, I visited unannounced, I don’t usually do this but I did because I thought we are in a relationship already. I knocked and waited for his response but he didn’t respond so I knocked a little harder before I heard keys jiggle from the other end, he opened the door and I noticed something.

He was not happy to see me, he unlocked the door and I came in, I could hear a lady’s voice coming from his sitting room, could be his sister so I calmed myself. This lady sat on the other couch chewing gum, in my favorite polo of him. I said hi and sat down. He came in to introduce me as his friend to his girlfriend. I was dumbfounded, speechless. It was hard for me, it felt like I’ve wasted my life with him, only to find out he loves someone that is not me, you are allowed to feel my pain and anger. I left grieving, this was a lot more to bare, here I was thinking he was mine, with all the things we’ve done and gone through. I just vowed not to ever cross path with him again. He called a couple of times to apologize, he kept saying he wanted to tell me about her and all that, but I was thought she was better at it than me, that was why he didn’t choose me. Love is the true key to anyone. With all that had happened, I moved on this time trying to find a partner.

I took ill on the 30th of January, 2020. I had pneumonia, but before that, I went for check-up and was advised by my doctor to go through a series of tests to know about my blood type. I came back to him with all results and the first question he asked me was if I’ve heard of the rhesus factor, it was something new to me. He went on to explain the Rhesus factor is an inherited protein found on the surface of red blood cells. If your blood has the protein, you’re Rh-positive. If your blood lacks the protein, you’re Rh-negative. Now he said I’m O negative and if at any point I get pregnant and give birth I’d have to take an injection called Anti-D administration to aid me to take in for the next child.

This was too much for me to take in as he went on to explain if the baby turns negative then there is a chance but if the baby is positive it is advised to use the injections. I left his office with hate in my heart because I remembered my actions a few years back. I took twins out, who was I going to tell, I needed to talk to someone, I called him and told him everything, he was only apologetic, it was his fault. I had just ruined my future by my own hands, who do I start that family I’ve always dreamed about?

He called once in a while to check on me. How do you do that when you clearly choose someone over me and still put me in a big mess. I stopped replying his messages, I was done with everything I had for him, I’ll just pick myself up and look forward, he was never for me, I just let myself ruin me and I have me to be blamed.

Lesson Learned

This is a lesson I learned the hard way that I am to be blamed for the decisions I make. And to be responsible for my actions. As young adults, we should also know everything concerning our health including blood type. Don’t make drastic decisions that will hurt others.

About the Writer:

Onyekaba Chidimma Amarachi is a young Igbo girl, residing in Abia state, Nigeria. Also a student of Abia state university from the discipline of History and International Relations. She enjoys writing, going out, and making new friends.

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  1. Wow! Now this is an essay. Guess I’ll have to look up that rhesus factor thingy on google.

  2. This is very nice. I’m a nurse and so many women end up childless because of ignorance.

  3. this is so interesting and also mind captivating.. you’ll learn to make the right decisions, ask the right questions before you get into a relationship with anyone. to avoid lifetime mistakes because you let feelings and uncertain emotions get to you..

  4. A real story.. Define relationships and beware of genetic Factors.. Girls be wise.. Nice story sis

  5. Lovely write-up I must commend!…
    Would actually advice parents not to shy away from “sex education” I feel the “lady” in this story would have had little or more knowledge about “men preys”

  6. This is beautiful… Wonderful piece… A word the say is a enough for the wise… Keep it up

  7. Oh my?… I like❤
    There’s a lot to learn from this write up… it’s really educative

  8. Nice write up this article really impacted in me this evening….please keep more write ups coming

  9. Very enlightening, never rush into any life changing decisions or any decision at all.. Awesome piece..

  10. This is a good story especially for our young girls in high school and college,I hope it inspires them in making choices when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex so that nobody will deceive them.

  11. i read this so many times, and it made so much sense each time i did…. Good one

  12. It is a beautiful story and kudos to the writer and is good to know that our young minds are putting down some good piece to help educate and enlighten our generation.

  13. Well the write up is good, just fill up the little loopholes of certain words that were missing

  14. Wow,I learnt a lot,most times no matter how things go about in your life,if you can’t talk to your parents about it,the doctor,I guess,would give you a better advise,always get an elderly person around

  15. Totally beautiful ?? A lot to be learnt from this. Can’t wait to see more of your works. Welldone!!

  16. This is really captivating, sex education above always seems to be a prerequisite in been safe.

  17. It’s a great ? story. A lesson to be learnt from both sides, the girl and the boy. You always have to know what you’re getting into and no matter how bad things turnout then you’d be ready to bear the cross cause you knew what you’re getting into and secondly, always have someone you can confide in other than yourself. Nice work, I look forward to reading more

  18. It’s very interesting and educating, i also think we need more of sex education to help our younger ones coming up.
    Keep it up

  19. Nice piece! Youths out there, all that glitters isn’t gold. Look well before you leap.

  20. This is a beautiful piece. So inspiring and all.
    Let your ink keep flowing. Keep it up

  21. Nice piece, very simple and in plain language. Good morals too. Don’t assume, don’t be too fast, don’t make decisions when angry and know the kind of friends you keep.

  22. After I’ve read this countless times, I pray this story could be sent out to the world. It is very PROFOUND.

  23. Very lovely write up.. One with real life lessons.. Good one girl

  24. Great story! It is truly inspiring. I like how it teaches the reader to be more cautious throughout the journey of life and how unpredictable it can be. Good job!

  25. Wow, I got the link for story 3, but decided to go through others. I must say, this very one is captivating. It has so much life in it, like it is a life story. Wow nice work you’ve got there. Keep it up. This is the best so far.

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